(This post is directly typed out from something I wrote in my journal a couple months ago. And yes, that is a photo of me in high school.) My parents struggled to understand me when I was a kid. I know that sounds normal and actually quite common but there were layers to it. I… Continue reading Alexa, Play My Chemical Romance
When I sit down to write, the first draft is always pen and paper. About a tenth of the time, I will type it out on here to share with you all. Sometimes I write about God but I feel reluctant to bring Him into my dark little blog. You might be thinking, jeez you… Continue reading Hey God, you up? I need something
Death anniversaries are such an odd concept. Why does it feel like we’re celebrating something? Or are we just saying, Hey everyone, X years ago on this day, a terrible thing happened and then we absorb that wave of grief and head off to work? Do I have to eternally acknowledge January 22nd, February 27th,… Continue reading Oh, Death Day, You Again
I’ve been chasing my connection with him for awhile and it was when I ran out of breath that I noticed I’ve been running alone. With every rise and fall of my chest I feel him slipping away and I know deep down that I’m putting myself through hell on purpose. More than anything, I… Continue reading Sunday Offering
I don’t talk about my therapist a lot on here or really the fact that I still go to one. So (Mario voice): Here we go! We had a really interesting conversation this week. Do you ever feel like you’re performing for other people? Like you’re you, but with little pieces of who they want… Continue reading Tips for a Satisfactory Human Experience
I keep journals. You’re shocked, I’m sure. But I’ve made a habit of buying fresh leather bound journals with crispy white pages, eager to watch them wrinkle and yellow and fill with pretty words and ugly words and sad words and then what actually happens is I get halfway through the journal and quit. I… Continue reading Here, read my diary
It has been seven years since I threw myself out into this world as an adult and I’m still searching for that feeling I’d get from opening a new box of crayons or turning the final page to read the ending of a really good book. I want to say nobody told me it would… Continue reading How Many Degrees Does It Take to Get to the Center of Your Dreams?